‘Be my Va-lent-ine’

Andrew Collis
Ash Wednesday, Year B
Psalm 51; Tobit 4:15-16, 18-19a; Matthew 6:19-21

We enter Lent with humility … toward a death, toward the cross … in a community Spirit.

Valentine’s Day (the story dates to the 3rd century) is about friendship, really (the Roman saint brought gifts and messages to prisoners). Connection, trustworthiness.

“Be my Va-lent-ine” means “be true, honest, loyal, open, vulnerable, an ally, an advocate, companion …”

In Finland, February 14 is known as Ystävänpäivä, or Friend’s Day, and everyone’s included. Celebrations focus, in their way, on radical hospitality, peace-making, new life.

Jason Isbell’s song, “If We Were Vampires” (“Maybe time running out is a gift/ I’ll work hard ’til the end of my shift/ And give you every second I can find/ And hope it isn’t me who’s left behind”) recalls a wedding vow … the watery depths of baptism … the sign of the cross in ashes.

And when my friend shared this song with me recently, I saw his eyes fill with tears …

We enter relationships (of all kinds) with humility … toward a death (the death of a loved one is especially difficult), toward the cross … and, crucially, in a community Spirit.

Why do we write/dedicate love songs? Why do we sing and pray?

The custom at South Sydney is to burn to ashes the palm branches and newspapers, heralds of a kindom we fail to embody even as we long for it – love it and belong to it.

When we say “kindom” we give expression and assent to the happy and sad aspects of love, our coming and going, rejoicing and mourning, living and dying … lest we speak too quickly of a love that survives, a love that lives on … in the Spirit … in the Song.

Perhaps there’s one line of the lyric or readings you’ll take with you into this season of Lent. How might it mark you? How might you allow it to mark you? Amen.

‘If We Were Vampires’

It’s not the long, flowing dress that you’re in
Or the light coming off of your skin
The fragile heart you protected for so long
Or the mercy in your sense of right and wrong
It’s not your hands searching slow in the dark
Or your nails leaving love’s watermark
It’s not the way you talk me off the roof
Your questions like directions to the truth

It’s knowing that this can’t go on forever
Likely one of us will have to spend some days alone
Maybe we’ll get forty years together
But one day I’ll be gone
Or one day you’ll be gone

If we were vampires and death was a joke
We’d go out on the sidewalk and smoke
And laugh at all the lovers and their plans
I wouldn’t feel the need to hold your hand
Maybe time running out is a gift
I’ll work hard ’til the end of my shift
And give you every second I can find
And hope it isn’t me who’s left behind

It’s knowing that this can’t go on forever
Likely one of us will have to spend some days alone
Maybe we’ll get forty years together
But one day I’ll be gone
Or one day you’ll be gone